Monday, June 23, 2008

Shopping at the Big Box Hardware Store

How the Man shopped . . .

Man: "Honey, do you have the bathroom hook so we can match it?"

Woman hands him the hook. He starts walking down the bathroom hardware aisle. He doesn't see a match. He walks across the aisle and starts holding the hook against bathroom faucets.

Woman: "Why are you doing that? Are we buying a new bathroom faucet?"

Man: "No, but if I find the match in the faucets then I know what brand and what line of bathroom hardware to buy."

Woman shakes her head. She thinks to herself, "Why not just look at the hardware? The brands and lines are all together so you won't have to hunt up and down the aisle to find the matches. I thought we were matching the hook, not faucets. Although I suppose new faucets will happen sooner or later to match the hardware."

Meanwhile, the Man is still trying to match the hook. Woman has already determined there is no exact match. There are three different lines of hardware that are the same color family, which is what they like. Mentally she chooses the line she likes and says to the Man, "There is no exact match. I like this line. Let's just a buy a new hook and toilet paper holder to replace what we have and then the towel bars we need."

Man is still trying to match the hook. He takes another five minutes to continue trying to match the hook. The Woman repeats, "Honey, let's just buy all new hardware. Then we can take the hook and the paper holder and put them in the downstairs bathroom since we don't like that hardware." Finally, Man agrees and takes what they need for the hardware.
But wait, there's more. Then they meet the handyman so they can buy what he needs for the projects he'll be doing in the condo. Off to the cabinet aisle to choose a cabinet to use as a linen closet. Now there are two men and one woman shopping.They want white cabinets to match the vanity. That was easy. While they were trying to figure out what they needed. The Woman quickly walked down the aisle and found the right box, took it off the shelf and brought it to the cart. That was easy, or was it?

Now they need doors for the cabinet.

Man: "I want the same look we have the vanity. I think the doors have inset squares." He starts slowly walking down the aisle.

The Woman quickly walks up the aisle and looks at the display doors. She saw what the brand and line name was and headed back down the aisle and found the doors. She pulls them off the shelf and brings them to the cart. "These are the doors we need," she announces.

Men look at each other. The handyman pulls out his pocket knife and starts to open the box. After all they might be the wrong doors. Woman comments, "I can't believe you have to check the doors. The name matches the name on the cabinet box."

Man replies, "And two out of three times you would have to return it."

Woman says, "I don't think so. I would trust the name on the box."

Meanwhile the handyman has pulled the doors out of the box and they confirm they are the right doors. While trying to put the doors back in the box the Woman wanders off and plays in her head how the shopping trip would have happened if she had been by herself.

Total time spent shopping: 30 minutes

How the Woman would have shopped:

She would have taken the hook and quickly determined there was no exact match. OK, what's the closest product line in look? A quick scan of the three available products shows the best match. She would have taken the pieces she needed and put them in the cart.

On to the bathroom cabinets.They want to match the white vanity. A quick look at the samples and she saw the product line she needed. Walking down the aisle she would have found the cabinets, with the doors a few steps down the aisle. Into the cart with the items and we're done.

Time spent: 15 minutes

Who said women don't know how to shop?

By the way, the pantry paint job is complete. The handyman and I worked through the design on Saturday after the trip to the big box store. He is going to have enough leftover wood that I will get to design custom shelving for my quilt studio. Woohoo!
I have a long list of house projects to get done so the handyman can do the projects we want him to do while we are on vacation. This morning I cleaned out my half of the closet. I packed away my winter clothes and filled a bag of donation clothing. Tomorrow I need to start painting the upstairs bathroom so the new cabinet and hardware can be installed. I also need to clean off my dresser and do a test paint swatch so the dresser mirror can be hung on the wall.

What's on your agenda this week?

5 comments:

Doodlebug Gail said...

Thanks for the laugh .... shopping in our house sounds exactly the same. And for that reason I will always offer to go to Home Depot during the week rather than go with DH on a Saturday morning which is such a big old waste of time. It's fun to read about everything you're doing.

Libby said...

Oh boy - that sounds like us *s*
Have you ever had to suffer the torture of looking for a screw (nail, nut, bolt, or the like) Hours could be spent looking at each individual bin.
I take the bull by the horns. I call it the 'dumb chick' I warn Hubby before hand so he can proceed to another aisle. Take said piece of hardware to a man with an orange apron, bat my eyes and ask for help finding one of these. Within seconds it's done. Hubby's way could keep us there for heaven knows how long. *oy*

Bren said...

Too funny. Lucky for the men you went with or they may still be there looking for matching hardware!
The pantry looks beautiful.

Candace said...

My husband has sore feet, and hates to shop so he is usually ready for anything that cuts time from a shopping trip. I took him Christmas shopping one time, and when we got there I said this (whatever it was) may be good for Stephanie. He said get one for everyone and lets go. He just doesn't understand.
I don't know which is worse, my man or yours.

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